Thanks, Donna.
MR. STEWART: Come over here, Justin.
Okay. Who's next?
TED: Grandma!
- It's from me and Ted. - What?
[Shouting] She can't hear very well!
It's from Donna and me!
Thank you, dear.
What is it?
It's an all-in-one remote control!
Now you don't have to fuss with all those gadgets anymore!
Thank you, dear. Oh, Merry Christmas, Ted.
Thank you, Donna.
Now it's your turn.
You said we weren't gonna do presents.
Just open it.
He said we weren't gonna do presents.
TED: I said that.
- Oh, my God. - What do you think?
- You like it? - It's so beautiful.
It has two time zones.
If a passenger asks you what time it is,
you can think about me. [Laughs]
I love it.
MR. STEWART: She's a great gal.
I think so.
Oh, you're not out of the woods yet, Donna.
You got one more present.
- From all of us. - [Laughter]
It's the annual Stewart family uniform!
[Laughter]
I got you a medium.
- I hope you like it baggy. - Thank you.
Time for the team photo! Everybody get over by Grandma.
- Come on, Donna. - Jensen, get in here.
It's a family picture.
Oh, no, Donna. Don't be shy.
Come on, Donna.
- It's flashing. - Quick!
TED: Quick. Smile.
ALL: Cheese.
Well, you survived your first Stewart family Christmas.
It was good.
I never knew a family could be like that.
No fighting. No yelling.
Normally, that "everyone dressing the same" thing
would kind of freak me out.
But I even like that dorky red sweater.
Is that all that's going on in that head of yours?
I'm just not used to all that, you know?
Dan.
Hi, Donna. How's life treating you?
All right. I want to get a confirmation for tomorrow.
Sure.
[Typing]
We got you going to Pittsburgh on flight 285 at 0800.
Any chance of that Dallas route opening up?
Let me have a look.
Sorry. Nothing yet.
All right. Well, thank you.
Have a good trip, Donna.
Oh, my God. Christine?
Donna!
Oh, my God!
What are you doing in Cleveland?
My New York-L.A. flight had mechanical problems,
so they dumped us here for the night.
Oh, right.
God. Look at your hair.
Oh, yeah, I know.
I'm going for a more classic look.
Goes better with Chanel.
Right.
I have the sweetest little apartment on West 73rd Street.
Oh, you would be so proud of me.
You know what, Ted?
If it wasn't for Donna,
I would've never made it through basic training.
Oh, now, that's not really true.
It is.
Actually, just last week,
I was thinking about how well you trained me.
I was on the New York-to-Chicago flight, right?
This guy gets on. He has this huge musical case.
He's trying to stuff it into the overhead compartment.
Clearly the thing is too big. He refuses to check it.
So I thought, "What would Donna do right now?"
So I politely said to him,
"Either you check it or you deplane."
That's not what I would do.
What do you mean?
Well, you must, as a flight attendant,
offer the option of buying another seat at half price
for that oversized item.
It's section 23.4 of the manual.
Well, I can't remember everything.
[Laughs]
But you should've remembered that one.
It was the last question on our exam.
Say, Christine, do you have any of those little wings?
My nephew's been begging me for some.
They don't have them on express.
Let me look.
Let's see what we've got in here.
Whoa. [Clears throat]
Oh, I love these.
Love it, love it.
I have so much garbage in here.
Ah. Here we go.
Future pilot.
Thank you.
Enjoy.
There.
We could do shots if you want to.
Let's do shots.
Want to?
SALLY: Paris. First-class international.
Paris. First-class international.
[Airplane engines roaring]
I think I'm doing very well at express.
But I just can't stop thinking there was
some kind of mix-up with my test.
Some kind of computer malfunction.
Those things mess up.
They lose luggage or send bags to the wrong city.
I'm afraid that's impossible.
The tests are hand-graded.
Oh, right. I forgot about that.
I'm sorry.
I'm sure there's nothing you can do anyway.
Who says there is nothing I can do?
I am Sally Weston.
I invented this.
Before me, they just pointed. True story.
Wow.
I did speak to John.
I asked him if I could see my test.
I begged him. He said no.
I asked him if you could see the test, and he said no.
Don't you worry about John. Did you see me on "Oprah"?
I scared the hell out of that little wiener Dr. Phil.
It's test 1047.
Hello. It's Sally Weston.
Oh, my God.
What is it, Donna?
This isn't my test.
It's my number. It's number 1047.
But it isn't mine. Look at those little hearts.
Time's up. Pencils down. Books closed.
Remember to write your identification number
on the front of the exam booklet and pass it forward.
So, how'd you do?
New York, here I come.
I can't believe it.
I trusted her. She was my best friend.
Oh, my God. These answers.
No wonder we sent you to express.
We were being nice.
I can't believe she'd steal my test!
Wait a minute.
That night I had you kids over for dinner,
someone took my airplane soaps.
Oh, my God.
She is probably stealing us blind.
Hell, I'll bet she's got a whole closet full
of airline property.
Headsets. Booze. Kosher meals.
There's two things we've got to do.
We got to get you retested. There's a group next week.
If you do as well as I think, we can reassign you right away.
How soon can you leave Cleveland?
I'd just have to talk to Ted.
Who's Ted?
This really great guy that I'm seeing.
Oh.
Well, I'm afraid you've got a decision to make.
Yeah.
Well, what would you do?
Well, I know what I did.
And so do you, if you read my book.
But, honey, it's your life. It's your decision.
Right.
Well, I'll call you later.
I've got a flight back to Cleveland at 4:00.
You said there were two things.
I'll take care of that.
Just skedaddle. Don't miss that flight.
Okay. Thanks.
WOMAN: Royalty Airlines.
Hello. Internal security, please.
MAN: Security.
This is Sally Weston.
I'm calling to report a code blue for Christine Montgomery.
Put a ghost rider on her next flight.
If you see any violations, I want that klepto picked up
as soon as the plane hits pavement.
- Miss Montgomery? - Yeah?
I have to ask you to come with me.
Why? Who are you?
Royalty Security. Please step this way.
[Horn honks]
Hey, Jensen!
You were right.
I can't believe it. I'm top of my class.
Oh, my God.
Ted, that is so great.
So get your damn coat on, Jensen.
We're going out to celebrate.
I have to talk to you.
I flew to Dallas today. Christine stole my test.
You're kidding.
So they're gonna retest me.
Wow. That's great.
When are they doing that?
I got to leave right away.
Okay. Sure. No problem.
We'll celebrate when you get back.
The thing is, if I do well on the test,
I might not be back.
I could get placed in New York.
That's it? We don't talk about it?
I come home. You're leaving?
Well, we've always said
that Cleveland is just a big waiting room.
For me, the waiting room was my life until I met you.
I'm in love with you.
I can't let somebody tell me that I've seen enough.
Not again.
Got it. Point taken.
I hated leaving Ted.
Ted made me feel like I'd finally found home.
The problem was, I wasn't so sure I was ready to be home.
[Bell rings]
Time's up.
Pencils down. Books closed.
Be sure to put your identification number
on the front of the exam booklet and pass it forward.
Well, well.
Congratulations.
I just want you to know
that I was against this retesting at this time.
That's not procedure.
But apparently, Miss Sally Weston doesn't have
the same respect for procedure some of us have had to.
So you'll be happy to know you got a perfect score.
First time in seven years.
The last time was me.
So I imagine you'll have fun.
Up there.
Living out your destiny.
Must be nice.
Thank you.
You're welcome.
Mr. Whitney, I just want you to know
I couldn't have done this without you.
Yeah, right.
I mean it.
You are an excellent instructor.
I am?
Yes.
That's the nicest damn thing anyone's ever said to me.
I'd say we're both living our destiny.
You do it, Donna Jensen.
You do it for those of us that can't.
I will.
Thatagirl.
Now you get out of here. [Chuckles]
Oh, and, Donna.
Fly away.
# It's a long way out the gate #
# Just to glimpse your fate #
# Just to see whether it all works out #
# And it's a long road, a heavy load #
# You got to really wanna go #
# And just let the others walk around you, now #
# Up and down again, but this time, it's different #
# It took some bleeding to straighten me up again #
# Oh, in and out of life #
# At times, it was difficult #
# I got a new life, baby #
# It takes some getting used to, but #
# No sign of any rain #
# My skies are clear today #
# I keep bracing for that rain #
# But there's no sign of any #
# No obstacles in sight #
# My skies are clear tonight #
# I keep thinking I might see that cloud arrive #
# Oh, but there's no sign of it #
# No, no sign of it #
# I got a new life, baby #
# It takes some getting used to, but #
# No sign of it #
# No, no sign of it #
Donna.
Christine.
- Hi. - God.
Did you hear the bad news?
What?
I got fired.
Busted for stealing.
Yeah.
So I just wanted to come here and say goodbye.
Donna.
[Exhales deeply]
You know, isn't it amazing
how there was a ghost rider on my flight?
Well...
And another thing.
I just can't help wondering.
How does someone go from Royalty Express
to International in such a short period of time?
[Breathes deeply]
Excuse me, Christine.
I had you figured out from day one, Donna.
What did you say?
You just couldn't stand the fact that I was prettier than you.
That I was more fun than you.
That everyone loved me.
All I did was try to help you out.
And you stabbed me in the back.
I never stabbed you in the back, Donna.
You switched our exams.
Well, if you're gonna nitpick.
And you left me rotting in Cleveland
while you went and dotted your I's
with those tacky, little hearts in New York City.
Someone had to put you in your place.
Little miss perfect.
"Oh, excellent, Donna." "Way to go, Donna."
"Is it hard to get international lines, Mrs. Weston?"
Throwing yourself all over that stupid Ted.
You know what? You make me sick.
Leave Ted out of this.
Just because you're pissed off that he wanted me and not you.
Get your hands off me.
Oh, I'm scared, Donna.
What are you gonna do, throw one of your books at me?
Don't you walk away from me.
[Grunting]
Ow!
Good Lord.
Out of the way, please.
Get her leg.
[Grunting]
You know what?
You got that fancy uniform and that [Spits] $40 haircut!
But I see right through you!
Right to the inside!
Welcome aboard.
- Champagne or caviar? - Nothing for me. Thanks.
Sir, champagne or caviar?
I'm fine. Thank you.
Would you care for some champagne or caviar?
No, thank you.
I would like a vodka straight up, though.
Champagne and caviar. Extra-wide seats.
And no bologna or cheese.
This was first class.
Bonne journee, Madame.
[Telephone rings]
Hello?
Bonjour.
Donna?
I'm in Paris.
Well, good for you. I knew you'd get there.
Can I pick 'em or can I pick 'em?
Rudolph, you're not tenderizing meat, for God's sake!
I really wanted to say thank you.
Well, don't spend all day on the phone.
Go out and see the city.
[Woman singing in French]
What was I gonna write?
"I love you but I left you"?
I'll just start with, "Paris is beautiful."
[Man speaking French]
[Speaking French]
Miss, thank you very much.
As soon as everyone takes their seats,
we'll be ready to leave the gate.
[Shouting in French]
[Speaking French]
If we're going to be late, I have to make a call.
[Man speaking French]
Oui, oui.
- Oh! - [Gasps]
- Oh, monsieur! - Oh! Oh!
- [Speaking French] - Oh! Oh!
Thank you.
Good morning.
[Answering machine beeps]
This is a call for Donna Jensen.
This is Jim Donahue with Royalty International scheduling.
You're on for tomorrow. 6:00 a.m. Flight 698.
[Beep]
Donna, it's Joan with Royalty International.
Your schedule has been changed.
You're headed to Lisbon on flight 432 at 1300 hours.
- You'll be back... - [Beep]
You'll be on flight 643...
[Beep]
Donna, Jim Donahue.
[Beep]
Hi, Donna. This is Joan with Royalty.
You're flying to Stockholm via London.
That's in two weeks. Flight 602 with Captain Hanson.
[Beep]
Hi, Donna. It's Paige.
I know you just got back from Geneva.
How about a quick trip to Brooklyn?
We're having our Christmas open house tonight.
Please come. It'll be fun.
Some of the other girls are gonna be there.
Call me, okay?
Donna!
- Hi. - Hey.
I'm so glad you came.
- Thanks for having me. - Come on in.
Oh, my. That looks so good.
Thank you so much.
Donna, you got to get in there and start mingling
with some of the straight guys.
We had them shipped in here especially for you
from Jim's work.
Oh, thank you.
God, you look really nice.
Are you serious?
Man, I'm so beat. I really need this rest.
Well, I think you look great.
- [Telephone rings] - Oh, shoot.
Can you just give them the address?
123 Clinton. Clinton and Pierpont.
Hello?
Oh, Bob. It's Donna Jensen.
Oh, when do you need her?
Really? Tomorrow?
But that's Christmas Eve.
You know what? I'll take it.
Yeah, I could really use the shift.
Christmas in Paris? It's a dream.
Okay. I'll see you there.
Was that Kim and Nancy?
Are you happy with your long-distance carrier?
- I said you were. - Can you believe them?
I guess they just figure everyone's home.
Will you pose for photos?
# So I'm waiting by the phone #
# For the blessed ring #
# Like a holy grail #
# For the Fisher King #
# Time is ticking down #
# Like a metronome #
# Rhythm for my brain #
# And its ceaseless games #
# I never seem to play them to the beat I hear #
# Though my heartbeat is a beat that beats so near #
# So I'm changing who I am #
# 'Cause what I am's not good #
# And I know you love me now #
Is that Donna Jensen? [Laughs]
Sally!
What are you doing here?
We're creatures of habit. Jack and I.
We have Christmas in Paris. New Year's in New York.
Wow. How exciting.
Really not.
Were you here for Christmas, too?
Yes, I was.
Gosh.
The Champs-Elysees and the lights.
I loved it.
Did I ever tell you about a nasty habit
flight attendants pick up on the job?
No.
We learn to always keep smiling.
Even when we're out of Bloody Mary mix.
[Exhales deeply]
Do you remember that guy I was telling you about? Ted.
Of course.
Oh, I just really miss him. That's all.
Well, what's the problem?
Go fly and see him.
Well, I can't.
I took your advice, and we broke up.
My advice?
Well, sort of.
In your book, you say,
"Don't ever let anything get in the way of your destiny."
Darling, I don't think you read carefully enough.
What I also said was that every pilot needs a copilot.
And it is awful nice to have someone
sitting there beside you.
Especially when you hit some bumpy air.
Oh, I just really miss him.
I just wish I could get him back.
The last time I checked,
you were a girl who could make things happen.
So stop feeling sorry for yourself.
And stop worrying about what he'll say.
You're right.
I'm gonna do it.
All right. But we have to move fast.
There is a 9:00 p.m. direct from Paris to Chicago.
If you got the last connection out of O'Hare,
that would put you into Cleveland in...
BOTH: 12 hours.
Who am I gonna get to cover my shift?
Are you kidding?
I still give the best oxygen-mask demo
in the business.
Get going.
Pierre, I need a uniform tout de suite.
Welcome to New York, where the local time is 7:13 a.m.
I'd like to personally thank you for flying with us today
and remind you that the last one off the plane has to clean it.
# Lying in my bed #
# I hear the clock tick #
# And think of you #
# Caught up in circles #
# Confusion is nothing new #
# You say go slow #
# I fall behind #
# The second hand unwinds #
# If you're lost, you can look and you will find me #
# Time after time #
# If you fall, I will catch you #
# I'll be waiting #
# Time after time #
[Doorbell rings]
Hello?
Ted?
Hi, Mrs. Stewart.
I'm Donna.
I don't know if you remember me. I'm Ted's friend.
We got you that little clicker thing for the TV.
Remember?
Is Ted here?
[Exhales deeply]
I messed up.
I really did.
I thought that I was getting everything
that I wanted, and...
I thought Paris and...
first class would make me happy.
But... it didn't.
'Cause...
if you don't have that person to come home to,
then going away is just...
I love him.
[Sniffles]
And I just wanted to tell him that he made me happy.
Who are you?
You haven't heard a single word I've said, have you?
I did.
I love you.
And I want to stay. I do.
Are you sure?
And you're gonna be happy?
Yep.
In Cleveland?
How are you gonna be happy in Cleveland?
'Cause you're in Cleveland.
I'm sorry.
Me too.
Sally had said
that life is a series of arrivals and departures.
But I learned there is more than one way
to spread your wings.
DONNA: Ladies and gentlemen...
welcome to Cleveland Hopkins International Airport.
Keep your seat belts fastened until we reach the gate.
We know you have a choice when you travel.
We thank you for choosing Royalty Express.
If this is just a stopover for you,
we wish you a safe, pleasant continuation of your journey.
If Cleveland is your final destination...
welcome home.
# Don't stop believin' #
Mark.
[Sighs]
That is bull S.
You want to know what's bull S? Eye exams!
You can't keep laughing at that.
That's evil.
I'll get it.
[Muffled shouting]
MAN: Cut!
Infinity flight two-niner-niner-zero,
you are cleared for takeoff on runway six.
Nine!
D'oh!
[Bell ringing]
I am a kitten.
I'm okay.
Got to take off. Don't I wish.
I can't do it.
I can't hear you!
ALL: Before helping the people who love you,
put it on yourself.
This ain't your mama's house!
Questions?
None.
Got to take off.
Don't I wish.
[Laughter]
I am Sally Weston.
Muffin! [Sighs]
How long do dogs live?
I love being a turtle!
Like the Mutant Ninja Turtles.
Okay. What did we learn?
Okay. Let me try it again.
[Whistle blows]
Okay, class, what did Randy forget?
- Mary? - Christine.
No.
Donna?
I know this.
Randy?
I forgot to buy him a drink?
[Laughter]
[Whistle blows]
And that is procedure.
Oh.
# We are Royalty #
# Flying just as high as can be #
# We are Royalty #
# Safety is our policy #
# There's an oxygen mask up above you #
# On a hidden shelf #
# Before helping the people who love you #
# Put it on yourself #
# Use your seat belts, as if you don't know #
# Make it nice and tight #
# Take a look at the exits #
# They're up ahead #
# To your left and right #
# We are Royalty #
# Flying just as high as can be #
# We are Royalty #
# Safety is our policy #